Million Monkey Theater

Hi. Following the success of my other Carnage Meters, I present my latest creation, the semi-official Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader Carnage Meter. Woo-hoo!

Well, even blind men in sub-Saharan Africa know who Darth Vader is, and thanks to the first three episodes, we now know his full back story as Anakin Skywalker. Over the course of these six movies, few individuals have caused as much mayhem and death as him. Starting out as a plucky boy, progressing through a period of uncertainly and confusion to finally become the epitome of ultimate evil, this character is one of the most intriguing and powerful in all cinema. And my son loves Darth's suit...

Back to my Million Monkey Theater please, for more good stuff.

STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE (2001)

On the planet Tatooine:
Damages 2 pod racers (his own earlier, so he says, and Sebulba's in the race)

On the planet Naboo:
Destroys 3 Trade Federation Destroyer Droids

In space above the planet Naboo:
Destroys 1 Trade Federation Droid Control Ship
Kills 25 Neimoidians on that ship (per galacticempiredatabank.com)
Destroys 150 assorted Droids on that ship (per galacticempiredatabank.com)
Damages 1 Naboo N-1 Starfighter (skidding to a stop in the hanger bay)

STAR WARS EPISODE II: ATTACK OF THE CLONES (2003)

On the planet Coruscant:
Damages 1 Coruscant speeder (Zam's)
Kills 2 "assassin bugs"

On the planet Tatooine:
Kills 6 Tusken Raiders (most likely many, many more, but can only confirm these six)

On the planet Geonosis:
Kills 17 Geonosians (the wasp-like creatures)
Kills 1 Geonosian Big Ass Cat (runs it down on his mount in the arena)
Destroys 4 Trade Federation Battle Droids
Damages the Geonosian Droid Factory (various light saber swipes)

STAR WARS EPISODE III: THE REVENGE OF THE SITH (2005)

In space above the planet Coruscant:
Destroys 7 Seperatist Buzz Droids
Damages 1 Seperatist Command Cruiser (blasting the shield generator)
Damages 1 Jedi Fighter (Obi Wan's)

On the Seperatist Command Cruiser above the planet Coruscant:
Damages the Command Cruiser (various weapon hits while inside)
Kills Count Dooku
Destroys 1 Greivous' Personal Bodyguard Droid
Destroys 25 Seperatist Battle Droids

In the Chancellor's quarters on the planet Coruscant:
Kills Mace Windu

In the Jedi Temple on Coruscant:
Kills 9 Jedi younglings

On the planet Mustafar:
Damages the Mustafar Mining Facility (numberous hits during combat)
Destroys 4 Seperatist Battle Droids
Kills 11 Seperatist Leaders (of about six different races at least)
Wounds Obi Wan Kenobi (slightly)
Wounds Padme (throat pinch)

In the medical bay on the planet Coruscant:
Destroys 1 Medical Droid (with the force)

STAR WARS EPISODE IV: A NEW HOPE (1977)

On the captured Alderaan cruiser:
Kills 1 Alderaan crewman

Aboard the Death Star:
Wounds 1 Imperial Flag Officer (chokes him a bit)

During the final battle above the Death Star:
Shoots down 3 Rebel X-Wing fighters
Shoots down 3 Rebel Y-Wing fighters
Damages 1 Rebel X-Wing fighter
Kills 6 Rebel fighter pilots

STAR WARS EPISODE V: THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK (1980)

Aboard the Imperial command ship:
Kills Admiral Ozzel
Kills Captain Needa

On the gas city Bespin:
Wounds Luke Skywalker (cuts off his hand)

STAR WARS EPISODE VI: RETURN OF THE JEDI (1983)

Aboard the Death Star II:
Kills The Emperor
Wounds Luke Skywalker

TOTALS

Destroys 1 Trade Federation Droid Control Ship
Shoot downs 6 Rebel Starfighters
Kills The Emperor
Kills Count Dooku
Kills Mace Windu
Kills 52 assorted living creatures (plus 25 more in ships' crewmen)
Kills 45 assorted Droids (plus 150 more in ships' crew)
Tries to kill his wife once, and his own son numerous times, and even has his own daughter tortured in front of him (call Doctor Phil, this man needs help!)

Thanks folks!